What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Randomize
