Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
