We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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