I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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