haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
