I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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