they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize