Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I'm too high and old for this...
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
