all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Randomize