There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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