This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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