dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Randomize
