This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
