Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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