whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
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