I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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