It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
