the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
He felt like a one man threesome
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
