I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
this hospital has no fireball
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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