The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
