I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
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Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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