what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
