started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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