She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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