he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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