I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize