this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
