Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
