yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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