i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I can't trust your balls anymore.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize