so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
