i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
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The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
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I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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