let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Randomize
