My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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