all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
