i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
