Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Randomize
