she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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