i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
