Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
