you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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