my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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