I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
