Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
operation have a gay friend backfired
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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