Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
