Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
