what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
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Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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