oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
