she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Randomize
