i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I just found a bag of teeth...
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize
