i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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